scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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