Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Randomize