So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
