don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize