just come out here and I will go home with you...
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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