His pubic hair was longer than his dick
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
