Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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