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• (312): View more from Illinois

  he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl

  (313): View more from Michigan

  you mean his girlfriend

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• (818): View more from California

  we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....

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• (858): View more from California

  I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob

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• (850): View more from Florida

  "Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...

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• (518): View more from New York

  I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.

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• (510): View more from California

  I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.

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• (772): View more from Florida

  I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.

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• (352): View more from Florida

  I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.

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