they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize