i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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