Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
