Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
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