If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
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