remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
That reminds me...we need to get swords
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Randomize
