I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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