Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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