I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
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