Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
