I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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