I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
