Screwed.edu
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize