question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Randomize
