Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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