East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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