I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
