I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
