I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize