I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
kristin has been a bad kristin
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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