Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
