The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
