OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
