i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
