lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
