cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize