operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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