I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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