I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
