What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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