That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize
