I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Houston, we have a blender
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize