Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
