dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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