everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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