dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Randomize
