We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
