Fuck appropriateness.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
