have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Randomize
