I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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