The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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