jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
