bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
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