the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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